new.

hey haha tahla taktaula nak rasa apa. this is. so. fucking hurt. as. hell. maybe im just not a good person to be called bestfriend by you or by whoever lah. why im so fcking desperately want to become ur bestfriend anyway? fuck. we spent more time talking abt our feelings, emotions, secrets, like. no one. knows you like me. or maybe... you regret telling me things..... haha em sorry. im not worthy. im... fuck, im so fcking sad plus marah and kecewa as fuck. i dont fcking deserve to be treated like this. god. fuck fuck fuck!!!! i feel useless asfuck rn. i feel like. im nobody. i rly cnt brain. fuck. this is so fcking hurt. WHY THE FUCK PEOPLE CANT SEE THE GOOD IN THE BAD SITUATION IN SOMEONE?! I CAN STILL FUCKING LOVEYOU AND CARE FOR YOU EVEN IF YOU BUAT PALAT SEPALAT PALAT MANA PUN, I WILL STILL SEE THE GOOD IN YOU AND HELPED YOU ALL I CAN. bcs sejahat2 manusia, still ada benda kebaikan yang dia buat kat aku yang aku pegang smpai mati. i nvr regret fr telling you things ive nvr tell anyone but im rly hurt and kecewa bcs i trusted you so much. i trusted and attached to you and i told you things ive nvr tell anyone bcs im way too comfortable with you, that makes me fcked up and end up you stabbed me at my back like this. woah. daym. ok im too emotional, thats y. it turned you off. i get it. but. ah fuckla, sumpah takleh brain sial. why?! i mean. apa silapnya aku... apa salah aku... apa kekurangan aku? why im never be enough... this is fcking hurt. ya allah... sakit ya rabb....

Comments

Popular posts

:)

i often feel so bad for turning down on people that actually try people that actually care and people that genuinely love me for myself its not that i dont like them its bcs of the trauma that haunted me that caused by other person. i kinda let them go chasing me with a broken heart its just that im so afraid im gonna be another disappointment for that people the people that i love the most the people that i really need in my life im just scared of my own shadow my darkness my nonsense thoughts my attitudes. im not a lovely person not even a decent person for anyone to keep im just gonna be hurting people for being me but somehow this loneliness kill me slowly struck in my heart and broke everything inside it hurts so bad. there are lots of people that im scared would leave me whenever i feel so comfortable talking with them in my daily these people meant the world to me but now i kinda give up trying give up hoping give up wishing they could stay with me b...

untitled post.

well, we all know the best stories comes frm the sadness that we're currently face right. i guess im rly sad rn. thats the only reason why im so rajin to blogging lately :') kalau tweet orang stalk. jaranglah orang baca blog haha. okay, what exactly im gonna share today? idk. it is just smtg that come to my mind all the times. am i not important to anyone? am i never be anyone's favorite? am i really nothing to everyone? i ask this every single day & it makes me feel more sad when they show me the way i think is actually real. its not really about mens. most of the time, i shall say here, about friends. everyone know im really into friendship. even if i get into relationship pun, i will care more abt my friends more than my man. everyone knows that... it hurts though, when we dont get the same energy that we've given. when we dont get the same attention that we give. when we dont get the same love & same appreciation like how we show... i didnt give all my ...

new life.

Hi, helu, 27th April 2024.  0226: im writing a blogpost again. after so long. guess everyone know what it means 🥲.  yeah, first of all, today i had a worst breakdown ever. i teared up real bad ugly infront of her 🥹. im so depressed and sad and fcking anxious today. the shit that happened today was... macamni. yesterday was great, we were watching The Night Agent tgt, cuddling and holding hands and kissing like we used to do lahkan. then we both sleep after rating the series. we sleep peacefully knowing that, thats the last night to sleep tgt (sebab memasing nak balik rumah parents). so... ceritanya, we both wakeup at 6ish-7 in the morning bcs i put the alarm soooo fcking much and annoying asfckkk. so at 7am tu, she wakeup tertengok jam. the date was 26/4. shit. we forgot smtg. she forgot to check the date before confirming that she got meeting on 26/4. i was at fault too bcs i tak doubleconfirm the date with her (usually i do) but tahla kenapa i tak focus on that masatu. meb...