night thoughts.

hi blog, 0333, 27th Feb 2022.

i guess so far this is the only month that ive wrote more than one post haha. honestly, i miss my bestfriend. by the time now ik i dont hv bestfriend anymore bcs nobody is catching up with me :/ and nobody's trying to repair the relationship with me :( but theres always that one person that will always be my bestfriend forever. though we never declare or feel it that way but we're always oversharing and comfortable with each other. though we've been apart by our own friend, we keep catching up whenever we had the chance. but sadly, we became too close with each other that moment, that makes us realise we're too scared this might turn bad, or worst,, became stranger. well, its too late bcs we've turned to be that kind of friendship now :') hitting up "hi" does feel weird, not to be dramatic but saying "imissyou" also feel wrong :/ imissyou a lot, but you never feel the same way, despite my egoistic side, i choose to hit you up when you dont bother to have me in your life anymore hm. well, its obvi not okay for me but if that makes you happy, i guess i shud just accept the fact and learned to be happy as you are :) its a sad fact that we can never be too close to our friend with the same gender forever bcs at the end of the day, being too close will just pushed each other away :') hm, its hardla to be close to people bcs we're too scared of everything, being cautious is so not cool. why cant i text you like i used to? why cant you reply to me like you used to? why everything become so quiet and uncomfortable? how did this happened? am i over-reacting? or are we not suitable for each other? idek. i just hope one day i got the explanation that i deserve. hopefully by the time i get that, im still waiting for you to talk to me again. be safe my love. thankyou for being there for me even just for awhile :') i will always be here waiting for you :)